Leaving Egypt!
Tracking the way personal growth efforts help change lives is like tracing the path from tyranny to transformation. Speaking to Omar, though, I learned of the more subtle ways Jordan Peterson’s ideas loosen the chains that bind.
Omar (not his real name), a 44-year-old Muslim who hails from Egypt, comes to Peterson’s opus having relocated his young family to America, first, then to Canada. About that transition: his kids and wife had been perfectly happy in Cairo. Omar knew that pursuing greener pastures, academically and professionally, would be tumultuous for all. Yet, he felt a need to leave.
Certain norms were untenable: in Egypt, beating children is permissible. The tyrannical posture of government mirrors that which characterizes many an Egyptian father. Gender disparities in that country are troubling. Indeed, when Omar has brought his kids to visit relatives, over the years, they are routinely shocked to register realities of Egyptian culture. No wonder Omar wanted out.
When the opportunity arose to pursue a professional graduate degree in America, he jumped. The next years were turbulent. Moving, settling, resettling . . . the family weathered each transition. Omar harbored guilt.
His professional ambitions strained wife and kids. Was he selfish? Did his success come at too high a price? Omar didn’t realize at the time, but he had an existential void, a need to formulate a worldview and philosophy that would shape how he lived, how he parented and how he led his family forward.
His inroad to Peterson was through Sam Harris. Binge listening brought him to the Harris-Peterson debate, a game changer. Order to chaos . . . that sounded right. Omar moved through Peterson’s courses on YouTube, including the Biblical series. Like many, he marinated in Peterson’s frame of reference, one that influences his own to this day.
The acquisition of a clear and coherent worldview has led to the resolution of doubt; also guided Omar in his development as a father.
Regarding his former guilt, Omar now understands: the move from Egypt was justified. Peterson hammers in: Tyrannical societies have a bad impact. Omar is resolved: “I didn’t hurt my family.” The move was appropriate and necessary.
Secondly, because fathers in Egypt tend to be tough, Omar had gravitated to the opposite pole. A permissive father, he was easily forgiving of bad behavior. Omar has modified his ways — “don’t let your kids become someone people won’t like.” He gives his kids honest feedback. His daughter has become a big Peterson fan!
Also, Omar changed his posture as a parent, reminding himself, “Don’t interrupt kids while they are skateboarding.” Now he lets his children undertake adventures and watches from a distance.
Omar’s story is refreshing. We don’t need to venerate his Egyptian heritage in the name of diversity. Omar says, “No culture is completely perfect. We have to discriminate between what is good and what is bad.” Omar wishes to keep those ancestral values that serve him but allow the influence of Western wisdom to otherwise modify and inform.
On a somewhat related note, Omar is rebuked with some frequency by Muslim friends who reject Peterson for some ideas that don’t sit well in his community. Omar reflects, “If I stop listening to anyone who I occasionally disagree with, I won’t listen to ANYONE.”
In fact, the pushback that Omar gets, negativity about Peterson from some in his community, accounts for why he agrees to participate in my interview. He tells me. “I don’t have a lot of people to talk with about Jordan Peterson!”
I get it. I’m a social worker who has been cyber-bullied by my colleagues because of my excitement about some of Peterson’s ideas.
Alas, if Peterson’s growing fan base continues to expand, the social isolation experienced by Muslim fans will abate. Peterson is offering some of his lectures with subtitles in Arabic so presumably that process will continue. In the meantime, Muslims like Omar — and his daughter — keep on listening, making positive changes.
Omar left Egypt, but wasn’t sure he had left ‘for good’. Peterson helped him leave — for good; now, having moved forward in solid ways, Omar will be easily able to locate the good in his upbringing, the good in his country of origin. Funny how that works.
But, as always, each article I write is, ultimately, about you. Is there an ‘Egypt’ you’ve been meaning to leave? Not sure it’s good to leave? Not ready to leave for good?
Nice to know, as you unravel the mystery that is your life, Jordan Peterson stands at your side: a lecture on YouTube, a book on the coffee table, a Facebook group of fellow explorers, a worldview at the ready, urging you forward to the next stop on your journey.
Annette Poizner, MSW, Ed.D., RSW, is a Registered Social Worker & Psychotherapist working in Toronto. Through her imprint, Lobster University Press, she has explored the opus of Dr. Jordan Peterson, having published a range of books: summaries, commentaries and even a Jordan Peterson coloring book.
